these past few post-college years have been filled with many moments of uncertainties and questions - not just for myself, but also for close friends around me. on more than one occasion, i've said the above statement in a reassuring tone to good friends, in hopes that they can refocus their energy on the things that are within their control and keep their minds off of the things are beyond their control. for me, i've gotten accustomed to that feeling of panic that creeps up on me every few weeks, knowing that as long as i focus on the tasks at hand, that feeling will eventually pass. i guess this is what has been dubbed the "quarter-life crisis". i find myself among a generation of very fortunate twenty-somethings who have a world of possibilities in the palms of our hands. ironically, it is this abundance of possibilities that seems to paralyze us from moving forward with our lives sometimes.
maybe it is not so much worrying about the things that are out of our control that makes us nervous, but rather realizing that there are more things out of our control than we are comfortable with. with a world of possibilities, sometimes each opportunity seems to rely on the realization of another opportunity, and there are times when i just want to lay it all out there and say that i'm just not ready to make these decisions! what i end up doing is attempt to prepare all that i can so i can cover my bases. in the case that option #1 doesn't work out, at least i still have options #2-4 to hold me over. i feel like i'm playing a slow game of process of elimination in hopes that something will stick before my options run out.
our parents were getting married and having children by our age - something i cannot even begin to fathom at this stage in my life, but what they had was a clearer path of what they are supposed to do. well, what am i supposed to be doing then? i have no doubt that's the question a lot of us are trying to answer, and at the end of the day, we have to answer to our decisions. when i was younger, whenever i did something wrong, i wouldn't be frightened about being punished by my parents, but rather, i was more frightened about disappointing them, knowing that i did something that they would not be so proud of. now that i have to answer to myself, perhaps it is the thought of disappointing myself that scares me the most.
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on a much lighter note: big, HUGE congratulations to GS/JB, one of the happiest couples that i know! it has been some time coming, but i am sure the journey is ALL worth it right? whether it is in love or in career, i look up to you two to know that there are successful, happy people in this world who are able to find what they are passionate about, inspire those who are around them and, best of all, able to share life's happiness with a significant other who is equally amazing :) i cannot wait to dance to 90's music on your special day!
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7 years ago
Awww!! Zu!! I was reading this thoughtful post and thinking about what I might say to reassure you as you face moments of quarter-life-crisis... and then I got to the end with the happy shout out :) THANK YOU! It would NOT have been the same had we not been able to celebrate with you immediately afterwards!
ReplyDeleteBut back to YOU. I think you're doing exactly what you should be. You've been adventurous, followed your instincts, you have passions, interests, a heart of gold, awesome sense of humor and, on top of all of that, an incredible work ethic, varied and well-developed skills and a quick-thinking, quick-learning mind. I have ZERO doubt, absolutely ZERO doubt, that you'll succeed and flourish. Maybe it's not clear yet exactly the path you'll light, but like you said, it will all work out. Beyond your dreams and imagination.
"And (you) can build this dream (together), standing strong forever, nothing's gonna stop (you) now..." Just a little quote that speaks to various parts of the post :) xoxoxoxo
thank you, g. on more than one occasion, you've been like the big sister i wish i had. your encouraging words mean more than you know :) i'll definitely keep you posted on life and things and can't wait to see you back at 640 waverley!
ReplyDeleteps. um, what song is that? i think i was too young to operate a radio in the late 80s.
=P